Will You Survive After Armageddon?

[Natasha Whittam]

Armageddon is coming. I can't tell you when or even how but, mark my words, it will come one day.

It might be a nuclear war or a natural disaster but it's inevitable that it will happen one day.

So if you're lucky (or should that be unlucky) enough to survive how will you cope? Until now your life has been structured. Get up, go to work, big shop at a supermarket, home, tea, tv, bed (or if you're Dave: get up, internet, bed or Dutchy: get up, make up stories, bed).

But after Armageddon there will be no structure. There will be no gas, no electricity, no shops, no cars, no computers, no consoles, no Sports Bar where everyone buys you free drinks, no police, no BWFC and no Burnden Aces. Money will be meaningless. You will have to do everything for yourself, right down to the basic tasks of finding food and digging a hole to dump into.

How will you cope? Could you build shelter or grow some food? Or are you likely to be dead inside a week? What will you miss the most?

[ReebokTrotter]

Build yourself an underground bunker and stock it with tinned food with a long sell-by date. Have a wind-up radio so you can keep abreast of events above ground. Don't worry about having no electricity just invest in some miners lamps which can be easily attached to a miners helmet.

I have a load of tips for survival if anyone is interested.

The largest city in Africa ( Cairo ) is currently in a state of civil war.

http://youtu.be/-NHNHqrTrtY

[Natasha Whittam]

Build yourself an underground bunker and stock it with tinned food with a long sell-by date. Have a wind-up radio so you can keep abreast of events above ground. Don't worry about having no electricity just invest in some miners lamps which can be easily attached to a miners helmet.

I have a load of tips for survival if anyone is interested.

The largest city in Africa ( Cairo ) is currently in a state of civil war.

http://youtu.be/-NHNHqrTrtY

You dipstick. This thread is about how will you survive after Armageddon.

[ReebokTrotter]

I may have lipstick on my dipstick but I am offering sound, practical, common sense advice. My advice is free. 

[Natasha Whittam]

I may have lipstick on my dipstick but I am offering sound, practical, common sense advice. My advice is free. 

Ok, so once your cat food runs out what will you do?

[ReebokTrotter]

I have a meeting with a group of New Age Adventists at 7.30pm tonight, I will offer some top tips later on , for those that are interested.

[Mr Magoo]

I may have lipstick on my dipstick but I am offering sound, practical, common sense advice. My advice is free.  

Good job its free, no fcuker would pay for that shíte.

[Diana Prince]

I've seen Mad Max in that Thunderdome & so will be electing to die, thank you.

[Natasha Whittam]

I would be dead in a week. I'm not the practical type at all.

[Mr Magoo]

I've seen Mad Max in that Thunderdome & so will be electing to die, thank you.

Don't be so hasty DP, You can come and live with me in the wood's.
We will be fine.

[Le God]

I think i'd do the whole deep impact thing where they stand on the beach and let the Tsunami hit.

i honestly wouldn't be that bothered. Bring it on.

[Diana Prince]

I would be dead in a week. I'm not the practical type at all.

I'd imagine the nail technicians won't be open, nor will the sunbed shop or decent supermarket.
It wouldn't be for me.

Thank you for the offer, Magoo, but I don't think a few trees will save us from nuclear fall out.

[Mr Magoo]

The wood's have a 60 foot deep underground bunker, we have used it for small parties.
I can store load,s of food, Bring your dog in case e run a little low.

[Natasha Whittam]

I think i'd do the whole deep impact thing where they stand on the beach and let the Tsunami hit.

i honestly wouldn't be that bothered. Bring it on.

Oh right, so you lose your rag because Andy Johnson doesn't sign for Bolton but you're not arsed about dying. Weird.

[ReebokTrotter]

In the event of Armageddon there will no doubt be pockets of survivors scattered across the planet. For those that are left, the future will look extremely bleak and conquering depression will be essential to maintain survival.

There are eight key questions that the survivors must ask themselves on a regular basis. These questions form the cornerstone on which life may be preserved.

1) What food are you eating, is it nourishing and good for you ?

2) What exercise are you taking ? Walking, yoga, the gym, swimming ?

3) Are you cleansing your body and face ?

4) Are you relaxing and making time for yourself ?

5) How much enjoyable leisure time have you programmed into your week ?

6) How have you responded to people ? Are you choosing a laughter response ?

7) Are you spending time in nature ?

 8 )  Are you taking steps, even small ones to follow some cherished dreams or desires ?

[Natasha Whittam]

In the event of Armageddon there will no doubt be pockets of survivors scattered across the planet. For those that are left, the future will look extremely bleak and conquering depression will be essential to maintain survival.

There are eight key questions that the survivors must ask themselves on a regular basis. These questions form the cornerstone on which life may be preserved.

1) What food are you eating, is it nourishing and good for you ?

2) What exercise are you taking ? Walking, yoga, the gym, swimming ?

3) Are you cleansing your body and face ?

4) Are you relaxing and making time for yourself ?

5) How much enjoyable leisure time have you programmed into your week ?

6) How have you responded to people ? Are you choosing a laughter response ?

7) Are you spending time in nature ?

 8 )  Are you taking steps, even small ones to follow some cherished dreams or desires ?

Most people wouldn't be upto surviving after a life of handouts and everything being done for them.

But some people would step up and ensure the future of human life.

Clearly no one on here though. They wouldn't be able to function without the internet and porn.

[ReebokTrotter]

Clearly no one on here though. They wouldn't be able to function without the internet and porn.

Don't include me in your conclusion. I have a parental control facility on my computer. After the Armageddon, the internet and porn will be discarded on the scrapheap of history.

In order to survive we will have to develop the full potential of our minds through the power of positive thinking.
When we flex the muscles of happiness and joy often, an amazing energy is available to us which releases our untapped talents and abilities and gives us greater confidence.
Happier thoughts lead to essentially a happier biochemistry and a happy, healthier body.
Negative thoughts and stress experienced for long periods have been shown to seriously degrade the body and the functioning of the brain, because it's our thoughts and emotions that are continuously reassembling, reorganizing, and recreating our bodies.
What we achieve inwardly will change outer reality.
This is the message that must be passed on to any survivors.

[aarons2009]

In order to survive we will have to develop the full potential of our minds through the power of positive thinking.

Ok Noel Edmonds, calm down. 

[ReebokTrotter]

Noel Edmonds is a bloody hypocrite. It's alright him giving advice, being a millionaire and all that.

If the earth succumbs to a nuclear war then large parts of the atmosphere will be polluted by radiation. It will take months for the trade winds to clear the air. In the meantime it would be best if the survivors sought refuge where the air is purest. The higher above sea level, the better.

Breathing oxygen will be essential for survival. The quality of your breathing reflects the quality of your health.
The breathe of life contains the essence of source. As we breathe air in, it enters our cells and brings light into them. The quality of breathing is important. The more deeply you breathe the more source light you take in, which keeps you calm and peaceful and dissolves fear.

If anyone wants to know the correct breathing techniques then I am quite happy to explain further.

[ReebokTrotter]

Thanks for your PM's. Here goes.

When you breathe deeply and evenly from the solar plexus, this is known as a peace breathe, for it puts you in contact with your deepest inner peace, which in turn allows you to access your inner wisdom.( This may not apply to all the posters on this forum. )
Place your hands on your solar plexus and breathe comfortably in to the count of four and out to the count of four. Relax and feel yourself becoming more peaceful. There is nothing for you to do other than to relax and breathe. ( You can actually do this whilst sat at your computer as a form of practice in anticipation of the end times)

Practice deep breathing for fifteen minutes daily when you are unlikely to be disturbed by anyone.

[ReebokTrotter]

Food will be another problem for the survivors. Most domestic livestock like cattle, sheep, pigs and chickens will have succumbed to radiation poisoning and WILL  NOT be fit for human consumption.
Man is a hunter gatherer so it is essential to be on the lookout for fresh meat.

Try and seek out a pond. You will then have fresh water and might be lucky enough to come across a duck or two. Remember, ducklings contain a high level of natural saturated fat in their skin.With the traditional deep frying, the good old Crispy Duck contains more fat than you'd think. Having caught the duck, it would be better to season it in the traditional way and then slowly braise it, allowing the seasoning to mellow its maturity and maximise its delicious taste and texture.
Remove the fatty skin and fillet the meat. Seal the filleted skinless duck meat in a vacuum pouch locking in its flavour. Then cook the sealed duck in a thermal bath without any deep frying achieving an even healthier way to enjoy your duck.

[Natasha Whittam]

I wish I hadn't started this thread.

[Squidgy]

Where would one go for a beer in this new world you propose?

[Natasha Whittam]

Where would one go for a beer in this new world you propose?

You would have to brew your own. Or trade something you're good at with someone who can brew beer.

[Batman]

Be happy so long as I've got a laptop and a power socket - can just live out my days wanking and playing Football Manager.

So I probably wouldn't notice much of a change.