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Natasha Whittam
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« on: 11 February 2010, 02:07 PM » |
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I'll start with one for Chris Amos:
38 year old single, overweight, ginger male seeks female (or camp male) for friendship and maybe sweaty sex in the backseat of his Nissan. Enjoys hanging out in Sportsbars with imaginary celebrities, slow walks in the park and making up stories about his sorry life. Anyone replying must expect a mental breakdown at regular intervals.
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Fair play to you then if you're willing to share your knickers with a willy.
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Big_Sharps
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« Reply #1 on: 11 February 2010, 02:10 PM » |
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I'll start with one for Chris Amos:
38 year old single, overweight, ginger male seeks female (or camp male) for friendship and maybe sweaty sex in the backseat of his Nissan. Enjoys hanging out in Sportsbars with imaginary celebrities, slow walks in the park and making up stories about his sorry life. Anyone replying must expect a mental breakdown at regular intervals.
Brilliant your back on form , I expect his imminent reply to be poor but I shall wait and see. |
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Natasha Whittam
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« Reply #2 on: 11 February 2010, 02:22 PM » |
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Big Sharps:
23 year old male in a sexless marriage seeks adventurous, shellsuit wearing, white female into fisting, butt plugs and shagging in pub toilets. Must have at least three benefit books, sorry, three kids.
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Fair play to you then if you're willing to share your knickers with a willy.
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Natasha Whittam
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« Reply #3 on: 11 February 2010, 02:36 PM » |
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Sir Nut Dingle:
28 year old Dingle seeks a Swedish man in his twenties called Johan. May consider 50 year old man with ginger hair called Gary. Enjoys living in Blackburn, flying his helicopter and playing football at the JJB Dome with his 15 year old "pals". Anyone replying must bring their own lube.
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Fair play to you then if you're willing to share your knickers with a willy.
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Big_Sharps
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« Reply #4 on: 11 February 2010, 02:43 PM » |
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Big Sharps:
23 year old male in a sexless marriage seeks adventurous, shellsuit wearing, white female into fisting, butt plugs and shagging in pub toilets. Must have at least three benefit books, sorry, three kids.
I object to being labelled sexless and married as neither is true although your asumption I would prefer the more chavier lady may not be far wrong  althought im spoken for so will not be accepting any dates at present. Do one for squidgy he is desperate and in need of non paid touching of his chode. |
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« Last Edit: 11 February 2010, 04:56 PM by Big_Sharps »
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a.s
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« Reply #5 on: 11 February 2010, 04:45 PM » |
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A thread so funny it made me re-register  Squidgy 38 year old Southerner, seeks female to wash clothes and ferry to/from the football, must have a GSOH and enjoy the smell of bacon...... |
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Squidgy
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« Reply #6 on: 11 February 2010, 05:38 PM » |
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A thread so funny it made me re-register Squidgy 38 year old Southerner, seeks female to wash clothes and ferry to/from the football, must have a GSOH and enjoy the smell of bacon...... I'm 39!!! And you missed out prefers big knockers |
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I have learned never to ridicule any man's opinion, however strange it may seem - ARTHUR CONAN DOYLE - Like fúck I have.
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Squidgy
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« Reply #7 on: 11 February 2010, 05:40 PM » |
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Natasha:
Seeks any fúcker into high end masochism.
Porky Dutchmen or Nutjobs need not apply.
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I have learned never to ridicule any man's opinion, however strange it may seem - ARTHUR CONAN DOYLE - Like fúck I have.
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The Ghost of Burnden
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« Reply #8 on: 11 February 2010, 06:01 PM » |
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I'll start with one for Chris Amos:
38 year old single, overweight, ginger male seeks female (or camp male) for friendship and maybe sweaty sex in the backseat of his Nissan. Enjoys hanging out in Sportsbars with imaginary celebrities, slow walks in the park and making up stories about his sorry life. Anyone replying must expect a mental breakdown at regular intervals.
Nissan?? thats a bit of an expensive car Robin Reliant is the height of my ambitious cars! |
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Bouncebackability.
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267
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« Reply #9 on: 11 February 2010, 06:09 PM » |
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Nissan?? thats a bit of an expensive car Robin Reliant is the height of my ambitious cars! Yes and that's a motorbike. |
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"What about the piranhas?"
"They're eating the guests Sir"
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The Ghost of Burnden
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« Reply #10 on: 11 February 2010, 06:28 PM » |
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Nissan?? thats a bit of an expensive car Robin Reliant is the height of my ambitious cars! Yes and that's a motorbike. Only for vehicle duty (more commonly known as Road Tax) - otherwise it is a car  |
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Bouncebackability.
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267
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« Reply #11 on: 11 February 2010, 06:46 PM » |
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What licence do you need to drive one? then tell me it's a car, it's just a trike with a roof.
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"What about the piranhas?"
"They're eating the guests Sir"
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The Ghost of Burnden
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« Reply #12 on: 11 February 2010, 06:51 PM » |
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What licence do you need to drive one? then tell me it's a car, it's just a trike with a roof.
The Robin can be driven by holders of a B1 category licence or car licence in the United Kingdom. |
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Bouncebackability.
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Didledee
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« Reply #13 on: 11 February 2010, 06:52 PM » |
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267Must like Wookiees Must look like Wookiees Must smell like Wookiees Must be has hairy has Wookiees 267 wants nookie with wookie or any sheep will do!
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* Jay Jay Okocha * Youri Djorkaeff * BWFC * Stu Holden * Lee Chung-Yong * |
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Archiebold Stanley III
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« Reply #14 on: 11 February 2010, 07:04 PM » |
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Come on Tash, hit me!
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Go fcúk yourself San Diego!
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Squidgy
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« Reply #15 on: 11 February 2010, 07:05 PM » |
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Come on Tash, hit me!
You applying for her ad? |
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I have learned never to ridicule any man's opinion, however strange it may seem - ARTHUR CONAN DOYLE - Like fúck I have.
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Archiebold Stanley III
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« Reply #16 on: 11 February 2010, 07:07 PM » |
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Needs must Sqidge, Needs must!  |
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Go fcúk yourself San Diego!
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The Ghost of Burnden
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« Reply #17 on: 11 February 2010, 07:17 PM » |
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Found Tasha's add in the Lancashire Telegraph!!!!
Hello, I am a vigorous, 55 year positive established man, who loves living. I love change and spiritually established. I only feel myself very well. Hence that I am in search of an independent man who knows what he wants for itself and with respect to friendship and relation. Someone whose glass is rather half-full than half empty and is prepared to show his strength in.
Just what the heck do you mean by the bit in bold??
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Bouncebackability.
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Big_Sharps
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« Reply #18 on: 11 February 2010, 07:34 PM » |
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Found Tasha's add in the Lancashire Telegraph!!!!
Hello, I am a vigorous, 55 year positive established man, who loves living. I love change and spiritually established. I only feel myself very well. Hence that I am in search of an independent man who knows what he wants for itself and with respect to friendship and relation. Someone whose glass is rather half-full than half empty and is prepared to show his strength in.
Just what the heck do you mean by the bit in bold??
How do you just stumble across the personals? Archie needs must eh? Only a matter of time before your cockney bride got bored. |
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Archiebold Stanley III
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« Reply #19 on: 11 February 2010, 07:38 PM » |
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Behave yourself Bitch! i rescued her, and she's still around to perform felatio on tap! when i say on tap, obviously i mean on birthdays and other special occasions! For fucks sake, her names not Natasha  |
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Go fcúk yourself San Diego!
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The Ghost of Burnden
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« Reply #20 on: 11 February 2010, 08:16 PM » |
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Found Tasha's add in the Lancashire Telegraph!!!!
Hello, I am a vigorous, 55 year positive established man, who loves living. I love change and spiritually established. I only feel myself very well. Hence that I am in search of an independent man who knows what he wants for itself and with respect to friendship and relation. Someone whose glass is rather half-full than half empty and is prepared to show his strength in.
Just what the heck do you mean by the bit in bold??
How do you just stumble across the personals? Archie needs must eh? Only a matter of time before your cockney bride got bored. Some of the personals are always good for a laugh !! |
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Bouncebackability.
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Natasha Whittam
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« Reply #21 on: 11 February 2010, 11:02 PM » |
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Didledee:
9 year old boy in a 20 year old man's body seeks female who enjoys nights in watching You Tube clips of cats playing the piano. Not interested in sex but will cuddle providing it can be filmed for a You Tube clip.
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Fair play to you then if you're willing to share your knickers with a willy.
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Didledee
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« Reply #22 on: 11 February 2010, 11:46 PM » |
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I really don't see how i've given out this impression!  And what's wrong with cats playing piano? |
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* Jay Jay Okocha * Youri Djorkaeff * BWFC * Stu Holden * Lee Chung-Yong * |
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267
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« Reply #23 on: 12 February 2010, 12:17 AM » |
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I really don't see how i've given out this impression! And what's wrong with cats playing piano? Because it was faked http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e2Th2QoHd2o |
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"What about the piranhas?"
"They're eating the guests Sir"
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